Summer's Over

Image by ArunaR via Flickr In six days, my summer will officially be over. The lazy afternoons at the beach, the unhurried puttering in the kitchen, and my hours of reading for pleasure will all cease when I return to work. I'm not complaining. At all. In fact, I dropped by my office yesterday and was pleasantly surprised to find myself anticipating going back to work. I've missed the kids - if one can call teenagers kids. And I am stronger than I was when I left for summer break. Sometime in the past few months, I started recognizing myself again. And it feels good.

Engaging in political discussion has invigorated me, and I've felt my beliefs solidify. I seem to be less and less concerned with identifying with the label and trappings of a particular politician or party and more interested in the inherent rights of humanity - and what it takes to make them accessible for everyone. It's felt a bit like shedding too-tight pantyhose and putting on an old, comfy pair of jeans. I can breathe again.


And my writing, while I haven't made any money or written anything publishable, I've come home to that, too. My first instinct is to capture everything in writing. I used to think like that, only to find myself too busy once I got a "real job" and became a wife and mom. But now, I want to write. I need to write. My blog, initially what I thought may be a possible money-maker, has become more of a personal quest to process what is in my head and in my heart. In my soul. I haven't been worried about how often I post, how many readers I have, and I've only been a little concerned with the lack of comments (I mean, does everyone agree w/me or do they just not care enough to comment?). But mostly, it is for me. Because I know no other way to live an authentic life. This is my exploration. My therapy. My growth.

So next week I'll return to the chaos of 250 young women. They'll look to me for guidance on their futures, and for the first time in a long time, I think I'll be able to give it. Not fabricated or forced. For real.